Whar yawl frum?

What state yawl frum?

Sowth Ca lin uh

The inhaditunts heah iz still a mite touchy so refresh yo mind wid a history lessun before wanderin' around heah loose... they wuz the furst stayut to seced frum the union... in fact they wuz so itchy to fight thet the furst shot uv the Cival Wah, the Cival Wah Ah sed, wuz fiahed frum theah Fowt Sumptah. Plez, Ah begs uv yuh, be on yo best behavyuah cauz don't nobody want them to fiah anuddah furst shot cauz they makes H-bombs theah now!


Flar dah

This heah stayut, whut iz attached to the suthurn part uv Jawja to keep it frum floatin' away, hazreely bin invaded by folks a'Lookin' fur thr fountain uv youth...'n yawl jist won't believe how crowded it's afittin'...Why it got so bad at one time thet they built a bridge thet dead ends 110 miles out in the ocean in ordah to fit rid uv the ovahflow... be extra careful heah 'n haveyo brakes checked often!
Whilst heah, be shore to rave about cartune charactahs, say how yuh hates Californyah, rave about teh orange juice but stay away from them rockets at Cape Canavarul... if haz bin reported thet they occasshunally sends visitahs whut don't spend no muney to the moon!


Nawth Ca lin ah

thez heah folkz iz often referred to az Tarheels. Now enybody knows thet win yuh gits tar on yo heel 'n then steps in sand 'r dirt, 'r whutevah yuh steps in, iz gonna stick to yuh feet... consequently, they jist plan had truble a' walkin'!... so they wuz clevah aenuf to invent the airplane to fit them off the groun...'n they'll git yawl off the groun too if'n yuh ain't awful nice. Be shore to keep in tetch wid yaw'ls relatives whilst a visitin' theah cauz, tehy wunst had a hole colony uv folks completely disappeah on Roanoke Island!


Jaw ja

JAwja iz known fur theah lushshus peaches... thosee thet grow in the trees 'n those whut set undah the trees! They also razes quite a few nuts.... peacan 'n peanuts, tet iz!
The native eat fried cick'n at least wunst a day 'n grits (Jawja ice cream) iz served wid ever meal!
Now yal jist won't believe tet big rock wut's 2 miles long 'r thet beeg swamp (equped wid gatahs) thet's 700 miles square... 'n unless yawl wants to be pushed off 'n one'r shoved into the othah, yuh best not brang up the name uv thet fire bug called Shermun!

Tin uh see

The nawthernahs had a terrible time heah 'n a battle took place at the dop uv a hat.. speshially a yankee's! This tore the stayut up considahbly 'n they ain't nevah forgot this neithah!
Wavin' muney seems to make theah memory bad... but keep in mind thet thez folks still likes a gud fight, but Lawd hep yuh if yawl starts anudder one cauz they've got a Atom bomb facitory theah now!

Vu gin yuh

On yawl won't believe the fightin' thet went on in this stayut durin' the wah.. the yankees dug trenches all ovah the porperty theah tryin' to hide frum the rebels 'n they were determined to keep the suthuhnahs out uv Washington...little did they know, we didn't want in!

Now they got a road runnin' partly on mountain tops 'n partly on clouds thet they calls Skyline Drive... hits about az closed to heavun az yawl iz gonna git... unless yuh happen to menshun General grant's visit in Richmund wid General Lee!


from Speakin Suthern Like It Should Be Spoke! A Dixie Dictshunary
Expersshuns Uv The South - Unusual Rebel Words


This is what happens when I am stuck in an airport in Knoxville, TN with money and need something to read!